Gal Pal Email Edition 18

Gal Pal Email Edition 18th

Contents:
Quips and Quotes
Ebonics Lesson
On the Flip Side (discussion topic)
Mama's Korner
Guest Writer
Shout Out

Quote and Ebonics lesson of the week:Mama after surgery: "I am so embarrassed, I peed on myself on the operating table."Kathryn the Nun: "well all those times growing up when we would pee the bed you called us 'pissy wissy'...look who is pissy wissy now..."Eruption of laughter, what goes around comes around.

On the Flip side (group discussion):
Forgiving ourselves and forgiving others...time to let go
One of the hardest things that I have even had to do was learn forgiveness. Forgiveness comes as a pair. You have to forgive yourself and you have to also learn to forgive others. We often times think of the word "Forgiveness" as forgiving someone else for something that they have done to us. We don't place the word with Forgiving Ourselves for things we have done in the past, to Ourselves or Someone Else, that are keeping us from striving and excelling and moving ahead, being all that we can be in our lives. And on the other hand if we do not learn to forgive it can tax us. "Anger and bitterness hurts you more than the person who hurt you; it poisons your attitude and imprisons your spirit."There is another reason why you should not dwell on an incident. Each person has a limited amount of energy to deal with things they encounter during the day. Bitterness and anger consumes a great deal of energy. If you continually dwell on an incident and stir up those emotions, you won't have no energy left to deal with the wounds themselves. Take time to heal from being hurt, but part of that getting over it is also that process of forgiving.In a nutshell this is what one professional says:To forgive another person does not mean you will forget what happened or that the person is not responsible for what he did or that you need to bring him back into your life. To forgive another doesn't even need to mean the other person knows you've forgiven him or her. To forgive another simply means you no longer allow another person's actions or words to cause you resentment, anger and pain. To forgive means you acknowledge that while you would have preferred the other person act or speak differently, you accept that person just as he is. To not forgive another means you continue to hold onto your resentment, anger and pain over another's actions by essentially demanding the other person be someone other than who that person knew (or knows) how to be. (Harder) The more we practice forgiveness, the better we will become at it and the healthier we will be wholistically.

Mama's Korner:
When your mother is going to have surgery the next day, there are things that you should avoid. Some of those things are eating at Taco Bell (ok, taco hell). If your stomach has been in fits all week, your stressed and all the fast food open to you and your choice is taco bell ©? That is the worst choice!!! Believe me, me and my sister paid for it later. So, later that next day when the surgeon came to talk to us after the procedure, I thought of words I'd never thought I would think. "God, I will be angry with you if something is more wrong with my mama..." and I am sure that this was the edited version. I took them back as quickly as I said them in my head. When you get that feeling of helplessness, your humanity and brokenness really shows. When you have no control over a situation that does not directly affect you, you are over come with emotion and it overrides logic and other things that you really thought you believed until tragedy strikes. Life is like this, there are many twists and turns and things that happen that are so unfair, but one has to persevere and move on. You can't blame people or God. You forgive and ask for forgiveness and press on. Otherwise the whoa's of life will overtake you and you will never achieve the better person that you are suppose to become. (Yes, my mama made a full recovery. She has to take an easy but she is so much better and is in less pain. Thanks for all who asked and prayed.)

Thoughts from others...

Usually this is reserved for pieces written by gals for the gals, but this was very timely...from one of my boyz.

Brothers, Family & Friends,Where were you when the world stopped turning? I was in bed, preparing to cook food all day for my last meal with my family before I left for college. I won't be overdramatic about my initial reactions (I was still half asleep) but I will admit to the following: That was one of the 6 times in the past 4 years or so that I "needed to put on my sunglasses."I was prompted to write this today when I was driving south on I-71 and I saw a man on an overpass waving an American flag with two little children at his side. When I saw this, I put on my sunglasses. My sunglasses aren't always used for blocking sun. Any of you who've seen the third Godfather movie know that Michael puts on his sunglasses twice when he begins to cry in reflection of his murdered wife and brother. I've also used my sunglasses for the same reason. I didn't cry when I saw the buildings burning or the people running. However, when I went outside to go to Non & Pop's house (My grandparent's house 3 houses down the street), I stopped and listened to the outside world. This was about 10:45am. Not a bird was chirping, not a car on the streets and certainly no one was outside- except me. I was amazed by the eerie silence of Cleveland. As I unrolled our American flag that had been sitting in the garage for that week after Labor Day, I put on my sunglasses.The next day, my best friend and I went to do what any passionate American would do and we drove to Case Western Reserve to give blood. Kevin Grady and I left so early that we were the first people in the door at the Red Cross location and helped set it up. What I remember most, however, was what I saw hanging on the RTA tracks over Mayfield Road at the bottom of Little Italy. It was a giant, white bed-sheet with black spray paint on it stating: "GOD BLESS AMERICA." There again, I put on my sunglasses.A die-hard browns fan like me was slightly upset to the postponing of the Sunday game, but I understood and we all showed up on September 23 as the Browns played the Lions in Cleveland. The heightened security, the men painted red, white and blue, the "U-S-A!" chants from the Dawg Pound were obvious signs that times had just changed. We won that game and I think our defense had 7 interceptions on Ty Detmer. I forget the score, but I remember a few things. I remember our starting defensive backs running out of the tunnel in unison each holding a corner of an American flag as they ran a lap around the field. I'll NEVER forget what happened at the end of the first quarter... 80,000 people stood up and sang along (without being prompted at all) when the song "Proud to be an American" came on. For the last time, I put on my sunglasses.I shouldn't make this email out to be too sad, however. Today is really a happy day for me in the long run. My grandfather celebrates his birthday today, and my little princess Gabriele turns one year old today. (Note: Gabriele is my cousin who appears in roughly 20 pictures around my room).My reason for writing this is because I want us all to remember. Notice that I don't reflect on the terror, death, and destruction, but I reflect on the American pride that resulted from this tragedy. I know this is cliché, but I'll say it anyway: You can't change the past. We can learn from it, however. We are Americans! May we never take for granted our privileges and our lifestyles that are supported by this great country. Support your troops, and remember that they chose to enlist in the armed forces because they felt a great pride for all that the United States of America stands for!
(by Scott Phillips )

Shout outs
Shout out to my girl Tina Phillips for taking me out to the best park experience I have ever had
Thanks girl!!!