The porcelain Bowl Vol 3 Edition 7

The Porcelain Bowl Vol. 3 Edition 7
Quotes
Catch 22
Things you may have never considered (new section)

Quips and Quotes
“If you stand up and be counted, from time to time you may get yourself knocked down. But remember this: a man flattened by an opponent can get up again. A man flattened by conformity stays down for good.” Thomas Watson

Catch 22 (Patty notes: sometimes I just find something where they say it best, so leave it alone, but as always, take these things with a grain of salt.)
English essayist Joseph Addison once observed, "The greatest sweetener of human life is Friendship." At his best, a friend should be honest, caring, good humored, helpful, intelligent, loyal, and, if possible, able to score you courtside tickets for a Lakers game. Mind you, finding a single person with all of those enviable qualities is about as easy as finding a supermodel at a Dungeons and Dragons convention. It's little wonder that French novelist Anais Nin remarked, "I cannot concentrate all my friendship on any single one of my friends because no one is complete enough in himself."

What you need are multiple friends, each with a unique specialization. Here, then, are the men you need riding in your posse.

1. The Drinking Buddy
A master at darts, shuffleboard and any other game during which beer is consumed, your drinking buddy is your right-hand man when it comes to downing ridiculous amounts of alcohol. He'll egg you on when you need it and call you a "panty waist" when he must, all while drinking Ireland under the table. Chances are you've been going out to bars with him for nearly half your life and you still only know him by his nickname.

Why he's an asset: Not only does he have your back in the event of a rowdy bar fight, he's also willing to buy rounds in order to get the party started.
Let's be honest: He might not be much of a designated driver and his financial advice is misguided at best, but no one's better when it comes to anchoring your boat race.

2. The Lovable Loser
He's 34 years old, he never finished college and he sleeps in his parents' basement next to the washer and dryer. To make matters worse, his job requires him to wear a hairnet and remove bubblegum from the undersides of high school desks. Sure, he might not have much going for him, but he's never too busy to return your calls.
Why he's an asset: No matter how bad you have it, he'll always have it worse. If you get a chill, he'll get pneumonia. If you get a cold, he'll come down with avian flu. If you get a beautiful girlfriend... well, the point is he's always available to hold the video camera. Who wouldn't want a friend like that? You need a guy who can actually give you some good advice and a buddy who'll worship the ground you walk on.

3. The Mentor
Unlike all of your other friends, the mentor actually has his act together. He dresses well, he's held in high esteem by others and he's achieved success in ways you can only dream of.
Why he's an asset: Apart from being able to pick up the occasional dinner bill, he's also a fountain of good advice. He's been where you want to go and knows all the pitfalls you're likely to encounter along the way. While your other buddies can give you advice on how to crush beer cans on your head, his perspective can actually help you in your career.

4. The Opposite Sex Friend
She's your tour guide into the freakish inner workings of the female mind, an invaluable spy in the battle of the sexes who has been to the other side and back. She may be a cousin, a former lover or a childhood friend (or all three if you live in Kentucky).
Why she's an asset: Her jump shot is dreadful and she throws like a girl, but she makes up for it by helping you to buy clothes and interpreting your girlfriend's psycho rants. Her brutally honest advice might even help you get laid. As if that weren't enough, she's also your fallback date for big events when other women are too busy "washing their hair."

5. The Admirer
Whether he's your lackey at work or the worst player on your softball team, he's the misguided soul who's chosen you as his role model. For reasons that are lost upon most, he looks up to you in every conceivable way. If it weren't for the fact that you acknowledge his presence, your admirer would very quickly become your stalker.
Why he's an asset: Since he holds you in such high esteem, your admirer will boast about your feats to anyone who will listen -- especially women. You can't pay for PR like that.

6. The Single Guy
A bachelor to the nth degree, the single guy lives life by his rules and has the stories (and tattoos) to prove it. Uncompromising in every way, he reports to no one and is always first in line for a raucous boys' night out.
Why he's an asset: Whenever you need a 10th guy for basketball or someone to kick the party into high gear, you can be certain the single guy isn't out having cucumber sandwiches with the in-laws. He prevents you from getting into impossibly complicated relationships and reminds you of the sweet taste of freedom. He's up for anything, including dozens of activities currently prohibited by state and federal laws.

7. The Connected Guy
Need a mechanic? He knows one, good and cheap. In trouble with the law? No problem, he knows a top-notch lawyer who just happens to owe him a favor. Affable and eager to help, this friend has more connections than Kevin Bacon.
Why he's an asset: In short, he knows someone everywhere and is always willing to hook you up -- just make sure to repay the favor. The guy who won't let you get away with skipping the gym, the one who helps you pick up and the most important friend a man can have

8. The Rich Guy
Incredibly wealthy and unbelievably generous, the rich guy is the friend you've dreamt of since boyhood. He has all the best toys and his lavish parties frequently get written up in your local newspaper. Best of all, you know he's good for bail money! Why he's an asset: In addition to his ability to get you into any club, every now and again you actually get to house-sit one of his sprawling mansions (Beautiful Euro Trash sadly not included) or borrow one of his impossibly expensive toys.
9. The Fitness Guy
A combination of Tony Little and Dr. Phil, this friend has the uncanny ability to inspire your body, mind and soul. He's a trusted companion in the weight room who will make sure you stay focused no matter how many hard female bodies are bent over the nautilus equipment.
Why he's an asset: He motivates you to stay in shape and spots you in the weight room. As long as you take his advice, you'll never get scurvy... again.

10. The Hapless Married Guy
Despite being your age, he already has 2.3 children, a lofty mortgage and a wife who makes Genghis Khan look like a philanthropist. Although he'll never admit it, you're reasonably certain she has his testicles locked away in her purse.
Why he's an asset: Above all else, he reminds you of the intrinsic value of staying single. One look at his weary face and stooped shoulders are enough to make you never want to commit again. As an added bonus, he can also tell you which couches offer the best night's sleep.

11. The Wingman
Like a Tonto to your Lone Ranger, the wingman's goal in life is to make sure you get lucky. He's there to brag about your prowess, back up your laughable lies and cockblock the competition. Why he's an asset: Easily one of your most selfless friends, the wingman is always willing to take one for the team. When absolutely necessary, he'll even slow dance with your pickup's Sasquatch-like friend just so you can have some alone time.

Honorable mention
Your Dog
No matter how you stack it, he's your very best friend. He's always happy to see you at the end of the day, he doesn't mind that you smoke cigars in the house and he's always available for road trips.
Why he's an asset: With his playful spirit and puppyish charm, he's a first-rate babe magnet at parks and fairs, and his loyalty is also off the charts. If any of your other friends could lick their crotch, you'd never see them again, but when Fido does it, it's strangely endearing.


A friend indeed
You can't pick your family, but you can certainly pick your friends, so make sure that each one serves their purpose. And just remember: You serve a purpose too. Now get out there and buddy up.

By Ryan Murphy (not to be confused with WB Ryan)


Things you may have never considered:
Signs You're Burnt Out

10. You're so tired you now answer the phone, 'Hell.'
9. Your friends call to ask how you've been and you immediately scream, 'Get off my back, bitch!'
8. Your garbage can IS your 'in' box.
7. You wake up to discover your bed is on fire, but go back to sleep because you just don't care.
6. You have so much on your mind; you've forgotten how to pee.
5. Visions of the upcoming weekend help you make it through Monday.
4. You sleep more at work than at home.
3. You leave for a party and instinctively bring your ID badge.
2. You blasted your Daily Planner with a .357 Magnum a week ago, but still haven't been able to miss a meeting.
1. You think about how relaxing it would be if you were in jail right now.

Gal pal post vol 3 edition 7

Gal Pal PostVolume 3 Edition 7
Extended Service Edition
Quote of the Week
On the Flip Side: Jessie’s Trip to India

Quips and Quotes:
“Never Give up, This may be your moment for a miracle.” Greg Anderson

On the Flip Side:
[Patty’s notes: I really wanted to give Jessie the opportunity to tell her story. I hope that all of you are inspired and if one goal you could make this year is to find one way to help. I have found that we can all do a little more…]

Heartbreaking. Humbling. Life-changing. If I had three words to sum up my recent trip to India, those would be my choices.

On June 17, 2005 I stepped onto the airplane for that long awaited moment. The opportunity of a lifetime was about to happen. I was about to embark on a journey that would forever change the way I see the world and life as it is. I was on my way to India to meet Lal Prasad, the child I had been sponsoring through Compassion International. For the next two weeks of my life, I would get a glimpse into his world.

I hadn't slept at all the night before my departure. I was awake with anticipation and excitement. Many thoughts weaved themselves in and out of my mind as I lay awake staring at the ceiling. What was his culture like? How would I be accepted? Was he as excited about meeting me as I was about him?

When I stepped off of the airplane, I was in for the biggest culture shock of my life. I was not prepared for what the next two weeks had in store for me. Our flight landed very early. As we exited the airport around 6 a.m., I was immediately surprised at how many people were standing around outside the airport. There were people lined up everywhere, people laying on towels on the ground, people driving cars, riding bicycles, honking horns, etc.., We were greeted by Compassion staff who had been waiting there for hours for our plane to arrive. They waved and smiled when we arrived. I could sense their enthusiasm. We all piled onto our bus for a brief ride back to the hotel.

We had not been on the bus for very long when the depth of the poverty there became very evident to me. Lining the sides of the roads were people living in tent like structures. Children were running around in the dirt and trash without shoes, and many without being fully clothed. People were sleeping wherever they could find a shady spot,and many laying right out in the open. I knew this was only the beginning of some of the things that I was about to see.

The next day, we visited a Compassion project and did several home visits of children who were sponsored. I was appalled at the living conditions. Most of the homes we visited consisted of either one or two rooms. An entire family, and sometimes extended family lived there. None of them had any source of indoor plumbing. The day I was there it reached 110 degrees and very high humidity. I couldn't imagine how somebody could survive in these extremes without any drinking water in their house, and certainly no air-conditioning. Most of them didn't even have a bed in the home. Despite these conditions, all of the children greeted us with smiles and laughter. They seemed pretty content with what they had.

I met many children and visited other projects, but I was still impatiently waiting to meet that one special child. Throughout my trip, my anticipation grew much greater. The day finally came that I met my child. Lal and his father had come 9 hours by train to meet me. Lal was very quiet and didn't speak much, but I knew that this was a very special moment for him too. After I met him, he pulled his backpack out and opened it up. He pulled out a stack of papers. He had kept every single letter that i had ever written him since I have sponsored him! I was at a loss for words. I felt a lump in my throat as I fumbled through the letters. It was at that moment that I realized the impact of my sponsorship had on his life. I knew that he was at a loss for words too. The only way he knew how to express his affection for me was to reach over and take my hand. He did not want to let go of my hand for most of the day.

Some of the images I saw in India keep flashing through my head. I don't want to let them be forgotten. It was there in a place 10,000 miles from home that I learned some of the greatest life lessons. I came back home faced with the question "When is enough enough?" At what point do I have enough things, enough material possessions to be content with, enough money to be happy with? Why is it only human nature to want more of what will not make us happy? Why is it so easy to only focus on self? And why can't we reach out and help those who don't have enough? Why is it that we have money to spend on movies, going out to dinner and entertaining ourselves, but don't have the money to help others?

I was challenged with a whole array of emotions as I asked myself if I was doing enough to help those who are lacking. I was forced to ask myself "Is there something more that I can do to take care of those who are in need?" I knew that I had to address these pressing questions that were heavy on my heart. Towards the end of my trip I talked to my husband over the phone. I knew that he must have been going through some of the same internal turmoil that I was. He suggested that we get rid of our cable TV and use that money to sponsor another child. I knew what needed to be done. I left India sponsoring five-year old Simran. If anybody were to ask me "Is it worth it?" Every time I see her picture and smiling face-yes, she is worth every episode of Trading Spaces that I will miss.

To learn more about the work of Compassion around the world click here:http://www.compassion.com/sponsor/index.asp?referer=60710

Jessica Hoffman

Editors note:This was Jessie’s way of reaching out to others and doing something great. I think that if Compassion is not for you, that is fine. Every one has a talent or dollar or time that they can give to help someone else. Remember “Service is our rent for living.”

Gal Pal POst Vol 3 Edition 3

Gal Pal PostVolume 3 Edition 3
Becoming Your Own Wonder Woman

Quote of the Week
"Don't ever be someone's slogan when you are poetry."

Inner Diva Speak
How can a gal have courage under fire?
Many times I have had gal pals ask me about how am I so brave. I never really thought of myself as brave. I believe that life experience has made me bold. To use the discipline of acting out on courage even though that apparent characteristic was something I did not have at that time. All this I thought about as gal pal Danielle and I were at this novelty shop where all this cool superhero stuff was being sold. "It is the summit of courage that demonstrates how willing we are to grow and stretch ourselves to better than we were yesterday. Paula Giddings wrote, "I am old enough to know that victory is often a thing deferred, and rarely at the summit of courage. What is at the summit of courage, I think, is freedom. The freedom that comes with the knowledge that no earthly thing can break you.

"If the little rock nine were not courageous then segregation would still be the way Arkansas does business. If Charlie Brown lacked the courage to get back up every time Lucy took the football away he would have never been ready to go to Paris in Bon Voyage! Charlie Brown! (ha ha) With that said I do think that there is a formula for becoming your own superhero. You gotta have the courage to become a better person. Never be content with who you are, remember that there is always room for improvement at some level of your personhood. You gotta have the courage to believe in a dream. Learn to sow your own seeds of contemplation. You gotta have the courage to start over again. If at first you don't succeed...try, try again. And when you operate as a hero remember that; a hero forgives, a hero explores, and a hero uncovers the truth.

Life is more than just about you, and any hero with super powers doesn't just sit on their gifts, they share them and give back to other people, even those who seemingly don't deserve it.There are tons of examples of women and people who have become heroes or sheroes in their own rite. But I challenge all of you to define that for yourself and learn to be your own wonder woman. She SpeaksOne of my favorite shows for like a hot minute was the Nanny. I really like Fran Drescher even when she did the Old Navy commercials. I read an article recently that she wrote about how she got over herself. I think that she spoke a lot of wisdom and so I hope that her wisdom shines through these long series of quotes that I share with you all.

"maybe because I was sick-and because old habits die hard- I turned our relationship into a hero-worship thing. If I was offered a job that would take me away from him to New York for six month, I turned it down. I didn't want to make plans with my girlfriends unless I knew that he had plans with his guy friends. The relationship was fast becoming unhealthy-he was miserable and he was making me miserable, too.

At last I said, 'I don't know what your problem is. I'm not making any demands on you." He said, 'maybe we should just end it now.' First I felt shock-then devastation. It felt more like an amputation than a break up. A week later I went to a celebrity tennis tournament in Florida and met a guy who was performing in a band. I was completely attracted to him and thought, 'this isn't going to be so hard.' Well, that guy turned out to be married and almost two years later I still haven't met any one with the qualities of my ex-boyfriend., though God knows, I've tried.

It hasn't been easy. Ultimately I've had to learn to be happy with myself. I used to have terrible anxiety about growing old alone or getting sick again and not having someone to be there for me. Now I understand that a healthy relationship is two people living separate lives together. In the meantime I am living my life fully. I've grown more in the two years since my boyfriend and I split than I did during the time that we were together. And I plan to keep growing, so I don't make the same mistakes the next go around."

That was great and deep.

Keep it real wonder women and go bucks!!!!!!!!!

The Porcelain Bowl Vol. 3 edition 6

The Porcelain Bowl
Attitude of Gratitude Part III of III
Quotes
Catch 22
Things you may have never considered (new section)

Quote of the Week:
From one white boy to a small audience of friends, including me, and if you know how I roll, I always have a little notebook to write down such notable moments:“don't mess with thunder and lightning, you don't want to get in the middle of this storm”this is in reference to his biceps…now that is even better than getting welcomed to the “gun show” or the “pit”

Catch 22
The Practices of Gratitude
I guess the pressing question on many of your minds is how to really change or put this new perception of attitude into practice. Well some wise person once said, “love is spelled a-c-t-i-o-n.” In order to really incorporate a practice in your life, you have to act. It can’t be this thought that has no follow through. So first, we have to remember to EXERCISE DAILY that attitude of gratitude. "I once was distraught because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet." Unknown. We all have a lot to be grateful for and just need to reinforce that truth with a change in our attitude and at the same time practicing this change in order to make it permanent. We also need to CHOSE GRATEFULNESS IN SPITE OF the unfortunate happenings. We waste time if we think that waiting for everything to be okay in life in order to feel thankful. At the start and end of each day, instead of listing what went wrong as a report for the day, start reflecting on all the things that went right.

REVEL IN THE ORDINARY and don’t settle that there is no greatness in the ordinary. Every time I see a full moon I am mesmerized. It is so awesome to me that something that is over a third the size of the Earth just hangs there in the night. Okay, maybe a part of me is a hopeless romantic, but it is amazing "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so." Mary Jean Iron had it right with these words, normalcy is something to be grateful for as well.

Everything is a matter of where you choose to put your attention. You have to remember to APPRECIATE THE ORDINARY. DOING THE WORK OF FORGIVENESS is also important. “Nothing blocks feelings of gratitude more than anger and resentment. The practice of gratitude requires the work of forgiveness. Forgiveness is what moves us from a victim stance to a freedom of psychological and/or spiritual dimensions.” I think an example that I can share that you all may relate to is my own relationship with my mother. I cannot blame anyone for how she treated me as a child. She had her own issues to deal with. But when I was old enough and mature enough to develop my own mind about life, I knew I could either forgive her and help her to help herself or I could be angry the rest of my life and have a non-relationship with my only parent. The power in that statement is that regardless of what had been done to me or by me, I had a choice of how to respond. No matter what there is a choice.

In operating out of gratitude, we should PRACTICE WONDERMENT. Many times children are enchanted by frogs, tree houses, sandlots, and how the sun rises. Even the march of the penguins. We as adults loose the ability to be amazed in wonder because we have allowed life circumstances to make us numb. By infusing wonderment into everyday life, this helps shape the attitude of gratitude. Don’t give into the “grass is greener” ideology either. DON’T COMPARE yourself to others. Happiness is not in a house or new car. Happiness is an inside job. Remember that envy stunts growth.

DEVELOP A GOOD MEMORY, or if you are like me, write things down. Recall with your heart the nice things that people have done for you. Focus on what is right. It is easy for all of us to overlook what is right. GIVE THANKS FOR YOUR BODY. In a time where society focuses so much on body image and fads, remember that having a sound body and mind is a blessing. Don’t give in to the hype about buying things to alter your body or getting surgery to fix stuff. You don’t need to be fixed, you are beautiful already. SAY THANK YOU as often as possible, even for the little things. You will appreciate them more. And something you may never have thought of before, WRITE A THANK YOU LETTER TO YOURSELF of what you are grateful for because of you!!! Yes, that is right! A love note to yourself. That’s hot. Remember that balance in life is a path you pave your own. Me being the DIVA means I probably can spend less time on self then others need to because I have a great self love and spend all that other time trying to love others. For some, they still know need to learn how to love themselves and at the same time figure out what it means to love other folks. Life is a process of figuring out how to be gracious, and I hope this three part series helped all of you.

Things you may have never considered:
This section is to share with you tidbits of knowledge for your everyday life…

The Energy Bar-according to Dr. Mehmet Oz, says that eating these fad foods is like “driving a hummer in the city.” They were designed for athletes. In fact if they have less that three grams of fiber, they will probably make you constipated…

.Since you all brought up poop, according to Dr. Robert Provine (psychology), the reason that men are more amused by jokes that single out one person for their behavior. So when a dude farts among other dudes, it is the funniest thing ever…however this laughter among friends (when done in good fun) is pivotal to male bonding. That is why when crass jokes are cracked, sometimes at someone else’s expense, it is tolerated for the greater good.

So with that said, don’t hurt people feelings, but the important part of that snapshot is that male bonding is important, and laughter helps facilitate that.

Look for family outtakes in the next. Until then, keep it classy.

gal pal post vol 3 edition 6

Gal Pal PostVolume 3 Edition 6
Attitude of Gratitude Part III of III

Quote of the Week:
From the words of Jill Scott, my favorite neo soul artist:
“I am a boisterous river
I am a mountain’s story
I am a quiet healing
I am a fragrant flower
I am a moonlit evening
I am a peaceful nod
I am a writer’s thinking
I am a wealth unfathomed…”

From the song “Still Here”
Remember you are amazing…

The Practices of Gratitude
I guess the pressing question on many of your minds is how to really change or put this new perception of attitude into practice. Well some wise person once said, “love is spelled a-c-t-i-o-n.” In order to really incorporate a practice in your life, you have to act. It can't be this thought that has no follow through. So first, we have to remember to EXERCISE DAILY that attitude of gratitude. "I once was distraught because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet." Unknown.

We all have a lot to be grateful for and just need to reinforce that truth with a change in our attitude and at the same time practicing this change in order to make it permanent. We also need to CHOSE GRATEFULNESS IN SPITE OF the unfortunate happenings. We waste time if we think that waiting for everything to be okay in life in order to feel thankful. At the start and end of each day, instead of listing what went wrong as a report for the day, start reflecting on all the things that went right. REVEL IN THE ORDINARY and don't settle that there is no greatness in the ordinary. Every time I see a full moon I am mesmerized. It is so awesome to me that something that is over a third the size of the Earth just hangs there in the night. Okay, maybe a part of me is a hopeless romantic, but it is amazing "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so." Mary Jean Iron had it right with these words, normalcy is something to be grateful for as well.

Everything is a matter of where you choose to put your attention. You have to remember to APPRECIATE THE ORDINARY. DOING THE WORK OF FORGIVENESS is also important. “Nothing blocks feelings of gratitude more than anger and resentment. The practice of gratitude requires the work of forgiveness. Forgiveness is what moves us from a victim stance to a freedom of psychological and/or spiritual dimensions.” I think an example that I can share that you all may relate to is my own relationship with my mother. I cannot blame anyone for how she treated me as a child. She had her own issues to deal with. But when I was old enough and mature enough to develop my own mind about life, I knew I could either forgive her and help her to help herself or I could be angry the rest of my life and have a non-relationship with my only parent. The power in that statement is that regardless of what had been done to me or by me, I had a choice of how to respond. No matter what there is a choice.

In operating out of gratitude, we should PRACTICE WONDERMENT. Many times children are enchanted by frogs, tree houses, sandlots, and how the sun rises. Even the march of the penguins. We as adults loose the ability to be amazed in wonder because we have allowed life circumstances to make us numb. By infusing wonderment into everyday life, this helps shape the attitude of gratitude. Don't give into the “grass is greener” ideology either. DON'T COMPARE yourself to others. Happiness is not in a house or new car. Happiness is an inside job. Remember that envy stunts growth.

DEVELOP A GOOD MEMORY, or if you are like me, write things down. Recall with your heart the nice things that people have done for you. Focus on what is right. It is easy for all of us to overlook what is right. GIVE THANKS FOR YOUR BODY. In a time where society focuses so much on body image and fads, remember that having a sound body and mind is a blessing. Don't give in to the hype about buying things to alter your body or getting surgery to fix stuff. You don't need to be fixed, you are beautiful already.
SAY THANK YOU as often as possible, even for the little things. You will appreciate them more. And something you may never have thought of before, WRITE A THANK YOU LETTER TO YOURSELF of what you are grateful for because of you!!! Yes, that is right! A love note to yourself. That’s hot. Remember that balance in life is a path you pave your own. Me being the DIVA means I probably can spend less time on self then others need to because I have a great self love and spend all that other time trying to love others. For some, they still know need to learn how to love themselves and at the same time figure out what it means to love other folks.

Look for family outtakes in the next gal pal post.
Until then, keep it classy.