The Porcelain BowlVolume 5 Issue 4

The Porcelain BowlVolume 5 Issue 4

What have you done today to feel proud series

Quips and Quotes:
“A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done.”

Catch 22:

There are several characteristics of principle-centered leadership as outlined by Stephen Covey. I think that because leadership is not in a title, and who we are day to day reveals our real character, now is the time to start changing your life and incorporating traits of the person you want to be. And if you want to be a leader or help others in any capacity then consider the following.

Covey states that principle-centered people show that they have matured and developed in such a way that they are not only good citizens but such attributes present in a person is evidence as progress and internal development. Effective leaders and principle-centered people are continually learning. They are always expanding their competency and recognize learning is a life-long process. They develop new skills and interests. Most of this level of exploration is self-motivated and self-generated.

Covey then lends himself in discussion of the second attribute in that they are service-oriented. Many of you may know by now that my life mantra is that “service is our rent for living.” Because we exist as humans it is the fact they we consume air in our lungs and take steps each day creates a debt that we own to our community, which is the world. Life is mission not a career.

The third attribute is that principle-centered people radiate positive energy. People of this ilk have a positive attitude, their disposition is optimistic and their spirit is enthusiastic and hopeful. And we must realize that we control our attitudes and how we react to people. Be aware of your own energy and what you share with others. Practice self control and discipline. Wisdom allows for you to make decisions on when to use humor to diffuse a negative energy situation and it also reminds you when to let something go and walk away.


Principle-centered people believe in other people. There is this quote I remember that says, “a true friend walks in when everyone else walks out (of a room)”. That is what it means to believe in people. You see someone tired, broken, and maybe at some point they had treated you like poo. But that is no reason to cease believing in them. We need to see the unseen potential in other people. This creates a climate for growth and opportunity according to Covey. The fifth attribute is leading balanced lives. It is more than keeping up with current affairs. And it is not about the person who has the most cookies on their plate. They can feel their own worth yet at the same time can see the worth in others.

One of my male friends made this comment that I think that all my female friends are gorgeous. I am not convinced easily by superficiality and it is my hope that I surround my self with beautiful people who are so magnificent on the inside that their bodies and faces are merely accentuating the positive. The human spirit and mind are the main events, not the side dishes. Having a sense of humor to laugh at oneself also demonstrates the balance in one’s life. Live sensibly in the present, plan carefully for the future, and flexibly adapt to changing circumstances. The past contributes to who we are but is not the substance of who we are because should always live to be a better person than we were yesterday. This is the benchmark of growth and maturity.

Life is an adventure. Covey says that because principle-centered persons’ security comes from within instead of from without. They have no need to categorize and stereotype everything that comes into their lives to give them a sense of certainty and predictability. They rediscover people each time they meet them and don’t box people in. They are present when they are listening to others and they can learn not only from their own mistakes but also the mistakes of others.
They are synergists.

Synergy is a state in which the whole is more than the sum of the parts. Principle-centered people are catalysts and change-agents. They improve almost any situation they get into. They work as smart as they work hard, according to Covey. They are not threatened that some people will be better skilled or equipped in areas where they are lacking. The result is that they can allow those folks to function autonomously.

Finally principle-centered people exercise for self-renewal in the four dimensions of the human personality: physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental. We should all be engaged in devoting an hour each day to each of these dimensions so that we are most productive in the other areas of our lives. Working out is not enough if you are not well-read. Completing private victories provide the basis for public victories. You cannot help anyone else effectively if you are not continuously working out your own personhood.

Last Word:
Assigning yourself. I have relearned this lesson in a multi-layered manner. Many of you well know that I advise a male fraternity that is Jewish. We just initiated 15 new members so I have taken it upon myself to help them with their growth and tenure at Ohio State. I know that being here is not enough. I realized that the boys needed some more guidance. I assigned myself to meet them where they are. I can’t be a half-assed advisor. I either will do them justice, or allow someone else to do the task.

Then as I met with the fellas one on one, I realized that they did not have the attitude of coming to the university for depth and breath. They saw it as a means to an end, not a rite of passage. They could not see it as a way to stretch and grow spiritually, emotionally, physically and intellectually. I realized that part of my assignment was to get them THERE. In that space of development so that they would not be 30 wondering what they did while they were in college. And at the same time, they need to assign themselves.

One of my boys does not even have a class where he is writing this quarter and he is a communications major. I could have died on the spot. I asked him how could he NOT be writing this quarter. I decided then was the teachable moment. I assigned him a book report this quarter outside his workload. I explained to him that he needed to assign himself because missing a moment to write as a COMM major meant that he was not pursuing excellence and preparedness. After a lengthy conversation he saw it my way. (smile). I then told him without struggle there is no progress. I asked did he know who said it. He replied no. SO I also made him look that up and get back to me. He emailed me an hour later. And also stated that he wanted to get his life in order and be prepared. He thanked me for keeping it real and was ready for the book. I thought to myself, how often do people just take the time out to reach out to another human being. To remind him or her to breathe.

And state the importance of the taking in and out of air. I find that is too, my mission in life. To remind people that living is not enough. One of the ways I define who I am is by the way I help others. I can feel proud today because I helped one young man realize that he was untapped potential. That laziness was unacceptable to HIMSELF. He can raise the bar without having someone set it for him.